No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
