They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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