oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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