Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
