Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize