What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
