It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
