Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
