I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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