brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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