Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
