Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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