At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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