Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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