no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize