no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Sacagawea was the original milf.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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