The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
