I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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