2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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