You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I had to cum in my sink.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
