I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
