Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I would fuck him just for his dog
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
