Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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