She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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