I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize