exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Randomize
