Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Randomize
