You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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