I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
