It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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