dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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