Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
