I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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