He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
