Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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