Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize