I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
