I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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