Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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