This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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