I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
