hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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