singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
