i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
You've changed since you got that strap on
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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