(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
