I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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