Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
