His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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