god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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