So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Say something about gay babies.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
