you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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