How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
