billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
